I am the one who things that I love leave for later. For example – I have a couple of bags with domestic tea – thyme, mint and a mix that my mother made. All of them I love to drink. And I have a lemon balm which I don’t like.
Recently I drink the lemon balm all the time because I want to spend it, so I could drink teas that I like without remorse.
And today I was cooking the lemon balm tea and thinking:
“Hana, this is some disorder. Imagine that you have a limited number of days – exactly as many days as you need to drink all your lemon balm tea. And you will wait to drink teas that you love”.
I can imagine that. And I do not like it. And I really do not know how many days I have in my life. And I do not know if I wait to drink a mint, thyme or the Mom’s mix.
No one knows that.
I am writing this while I wait for my lemon balm tea to cool. They say it is good for concentration and relieving of stress.
I do not have to say I apply this behavior in my life often, on different situations. I do not know why is that and I do not know why I now recognized that as a problem. Because it is a problem.
Even when I must decide about so ordinary things like a choice of tea – I stop and choose with my strange logic. That logic comes from whom knows where and who knows from what. And while I am writing this I think “What if you would drink only teas that you love? Is not that a bit arrogant of you? There are people who do not have to drink anything, and you want to choose?
I think some things in my mind needs serious approach.
I will think about that when I drink this lemon balm tea.
And how do you choose tea for drinking?